Dreams beats reality?

Bad dreams = not a good nights' sleep. We're not talking about nightmare, just dreams that you can be less fond of, I you would be able to pick. Sometimes your past catch up, there's nothing more to that. But what if it doesn't stop? I've managed to somewhat erase many things from my life - but that doesn't mean it haven't happened. But I really dislike my dreams at the moment, they are so close that they feel like they are happening, and I believe it. Some sort of psychotic experience if you may want to call it anything, I don't know, but this beats my reality into pieces...

Take care

/Anna

Dusty dreams in my mind this very instant...

Some pictures that now is totally taking up my mind, diffrent times, but oh, I love the fairytale and dusty, shimmering feeling around these ones... It makes me smile. I true have a really fascination of storys they all tell me...

Dreamy dusty kisses

/Anna

There's no limit in my fantasy, except me.

Having pain in your whole body - all along every day that passes by, is dreadful. If I wasn't in a happy state of mind, I'd think I'd be laying with a saw cutting everything except the head of... eh? But I don't, I'm a survivor, but I have to admit, that I sometimes do tend to wonder about that. I can't stand myself sometimes, so I wonder how my family is adjusting to the situation? You can't control the weather - neither me. Therefore dreaming is one of the best parts of the life I'm living, I can have my painless body, and my mind can spin as it wants to. There's no

limit in my fantasy, the world I do now enjoy entering. Cause there's no limits, only the ones I create.

Fantasy loveliness

/Anna

Dreams become reality?

I have absolutely nothing funny (thought or thing) to write about, my dreams this night (the ones I remembered) were really bizarre, you're in some kind of delirium. I got a job at a fashion magazine (no nothing strange yet) but the things around it, were oddly creepy, like being chased and played like a toy... My subconscious mind saw all kinds of people, like a normal sized woman, with no arms and legs, poking me (with what?) - and although you want to remember everything - the brain seems only to remember the most outrageous things. As me running away, towards my mother and fathers car, from the woman with only a body chasing me to wherever I tend to run or turn, there she was, looking extremly repugangtly bizarre (but not in a good way). Maybe this either sound terrifying or any verb you want to put in. It's hell when this really is happening, the reality is so close that it transforms itself to it. Waking only to realise that, nothing happened, or did it? My logical part says this, the unlogical that.


Wishful dreams
/Anna

Bizarre dreamworlds in reality?

Today my head is put on blank, which means that it's possibly overloaded or totally empty. I don't have any idea of what. I dreamt a really strangely bizarre dream tonight, I was at my old friend Malins' school, going back for about 4 years and explaining about my hair that my hairdresser does for me for weirdos, on top of that I have to take a bus cause I have to go to my school, and people from my childhood appeard from odd places taking me hostage - about who's cutting my hair! And this was all happening in the morning? Of course there's more, but that's for me to keep. Did I tell you that it was so real that I thought it happened....

Am I going crazy? Oh, wait, I'm already there!

Xx
/Anna

I belive in people lying, I belive in people dying, I belive in people flying, I belive in people crying...

Of course I dreamt about stuff tonight, but not so pleasant things, I'll tell you. I'm just wondering why I'm dreaming about stuff that in a point of veiw isn't that important... But somehow seem to scare the shit out of me, sometimes things are pretty real for me, that I don't know how it haven't happened when I wake up. I'm so asure of that what I'm dreaming is reality that I don't seem to get a grip over that it isn't.


I just found a old favorite song of mine, really lovely one. But quite hard in the lyrics, I can remember why you can get a major anxiety attack listenint to this music without all the distance to it, fortunally I do have this (at least I think that) never the less, it's a lovely song, and Tricky is a master in doing music in a specific way. None the less, I think I'm going out for a walk, I have to loose about 22 lbs or more, for my own sake...

Xx
/Anna

Now there you go again you say, You want your freedom, Well who am I to keep you down?

For the moment, yes, right now. I don't know what's right and what's wrong. I don't have a clue. I know for sure that I'm just confused but there's something else, nothing big, but it's nagging me. When did I fall so far out of trace? When did I really begin to understand life? Cause I don't know if I've have done that yet. I stay conflicted in my own mind, and as long as it's a short amount off time I'll be fine... Oh, I know it will be short, cause I'm not going to drag myself in the mudd. And I know that it's just a bump in the road. I keep getting better, and I love that I don't have to dig my own grave. Just to be a little melodramatic, haha! I'm fine, but I'm dreaming strange dreams - everything is as it should be in other cases.


Tonight I dreamed about a concert, Jean Michel Jarres, my dreams are sometimes so real that I have no clue if it's really happening or if it's just a dream. It was just a weird night/morning...

Xx
/Anna

I'm so starstruck, baby could you blow my heart up?

I'll just have to post some pictures of some things I really would like to have in my closet, we'll see what exactly I want right now. I can assure you that it is always something, some new pair of shoes, a new skirt, maybe a dress or perhaps a top. We'll see... Here are two-three things I want!

These sunglasses are exactly my style!

This top/tunic is also one thing I would love to wear in the summer!
Maybe with some kind of nice high heels and accessories, I think that would be a smash!

This one is a really big favorite right now, cause of the low cut back and a bow!
How marvelous! I think I'm in love!

xo xo
Ciao!

I Only Dream In Black And White, To Save Me From Myself

Jag har konstiga drömmar igen, och jag är inte så high på det. Då de är absurda och förvrängda, jag gillar inte när det händer, inte alls. Något förstörs lite inom mig när jag drömmer. Jag vill bara drömma svarta eller vita drömmar, då vet man vad som är dröm och vad som är vad, och ingenting mittimellan. Jag vill inte vara grå i mina drömmar, så enkelt är det.

Jag har tröttnat på nästintill allt, just nu. Dessutom är jag helt ensam, jag har ingen nära vän längre, det är så det känns i alla fall. Jag har vänner, men ingen nära vän. Jag har alltid varit ensam, men nu är jag det på riktigt, nu är jag riktigt, riktigt ensam. Den tär på mig. Jag kan inte prata om något med någon, det gör mig väldigt sorgsen, men what the hell, that's life. Jag går inte samma väg som andra, jag går min egna väg.

Btw, jag har världens bästa mamma, och det är inte att vara överflödig. Jag pratade med henne igår och hon förstod det jag pratade om, självklart blir hon orolig, men hon hjälper mig och hon kommer fortsätta att hjälpa mig tills jag verkligen står på egna ben, det gör jag halvt nu. Jag har inte flyttat hemifrån ännu.

Ikväll är det 90's och jag ska gå dit med min lillebror och det ska bli riktigt roligt, nu får han se lite andra saker än det han är van vid att se, och att han följer med är bara roligt, jag är glad att jag fått med honom.

Kakan, Looove yoou!

Ciao!