Don't stop me now, Don't need to catch my breath, I can go on and on and on...

How bad does hard selfdicipline sound in your ears, does it hurt or do you like it? I like it, when you do it to yourself and not to anyone else, except those who wants to have that selfdicipline. I just know that I have to take control, no one is going to do that for you and yes it's just the begining and are there such a thing as an ending? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I just keep my self on a restrained order in my life now, I have to have the control I'm seeking. Maybe that makes me a perfectionist, but that starts showing in more parts than just the things I style. I think I'm evolving and I don't feel bad. I'm not going to stop 'til I've gotten enough, and not even then... I need perfection in my wonderful chaos around me...


Xx
/Anna

I'm not interested in fakers and I don't do funny buisness...

I am currently considering to not have any anxiety-attacks anymore, the problem there is that you can't really decide when you're gonna have 'em. It's like a neverending circus when you have it, like you're riding a rollercoaster and you feel really nauseous, not a funny feeling at all. Yesterday I felt the urge to write in my very own personal journal and it wasn't anything bad, just that I feel that I always keep second guessing myself, a feeling not so easy to get rid of, I don't belive in myself all the time - but can you tell me anyone who is always certain they've done the best thing, a perfect job. Nothing is perfect, you can't expect that people will do things perfect, but you can however pursue and expect that a person will do as best as he or she can. None the less. This photosession and some of it's pictures is close to perfection for me - and it gives me anxiety that I can't perform as well as that yet.


I want to buy tons of new stuff, but I don't know which ones are the ones that are the most valuable for me, maybe I'll find something...





xo xo
Ciao!