Sunday, March 15, 2009

Ever thine, ever mine, ever ours...

Almost everything I write right now is about fashion and, as I got to thinking. What right do I have to put loads of shit on people for how they dress. I'm not an evil person, nor will I ever be that (I think). But I do have an urge to feel that people always can look their best at all times, I think that is what it's all about. That's why I want people to know their sizes and their measurements and, not to forget to know their color. Everyone can pull of a little black dress, but to dare color is something a lot of people I know is afraid of. I don't think I am that anymore. I love color - but that doesn't mean that I don't love black, cause I do that to. Common use of colors is red, white and sometimes green, but never anything really daring, like orange and a slightly shade of lemon? I love wearing colors - nowadays - and I am determined to get myself a maxidress this summer, that I have done... I'm slightly mad I know. But I want one and I'm short that eqaul making it myself!

I want to be in love, to have butterflies in my stomach and feel these springfeelings again, although I hate it when it happens, it buggs the hell out of me to know that I've never been in love (Yes, for real) I've never totally fallen for someone, I've had crushes but nothing that ever has deepened. I don't know why, am I incappable to fall in love? I thought I had Mr Big, but when I look back now it wasn't that love, he's not the love of my life. Maybe my mistakes in all the men I've dated has always been that I always needed them to substantiate me. The feeling of the substantion that you know comes seeking for you when you meet someone, you want them to like what you wear, that you look beautiful and all that sort of things. I don't want a man to confirm me for that shallow things (who the hell does she think she is, she's always talking about shallow things), I want them to tell me that I'm ok for all the things I am and am not, just that, but of course when a person I know tells me I'm beautiful I take it as a huge compliment and all of you should know I never give a compliment to someone I don't think deserves it.

But damn, do I want those butterflies in my stomach, now!

xo xo

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